Meet Me at Starbucks Sometime Tomorrow Afternoon

You would never set a physical meeting for "Sometime Tomorrow Afternoon." Don't do it on the phone unless you want to play phone tag. Send people this article if they don't get the message!

Have you ever had trouble getting together with someone on the phone? If your experience is anything like mine, this has happened to you many times in your life. You call someone and leave a message and they do the same and sometimes it happens 8 or 10 times back and forth before you finally are both available at the same time. Many of us call this phone tag. Would you like phone tag to happen a lot less often or maybe even close to never?

By way of comparison, let's think about what happens when we plan to meet someone in person. We communicate in person or on the phone or over Skype or even through email (or snail mail!) in order to set up a time when we will meet at Starbucks, for example. We decide on a definite time and we meet there. Most of the time these meetings come off without a hitch. (For you sticklers, I don't consider someone being 5 minutes late a "hitch".) Sometimes one person or the other messes up and the meeting starts really late or the meeting doesn't happen.

Here's what NEVER happens:

Lucille calls Paul and says "Let's meet at Starbucks tomorrow." Paul says "When is a good time for you?"
Then Lucille replies "Sometime Tomorrow Afternoon." Paul answers "Sounds good to me. See you there!" The next day Paul goes to Starbucks (which is next to Barnes and Noble) and sits down with a book at 12:01 and waits for Lucille to arrive. Paul waits patiently until 3:15 when Lucille shows up and they have their happy and productive meeting.

Have you ever done what Paul and Lucille did? Me neither.

Yet many people operate that way with the telephone (or Skype and the like) ALL. THE. TIME. Do you like playing phone tag? (I don't either so I prefer to keep it to a minimum with friends and family only!) What do you do about it? One solution: make a phone appointment.

You would never set the time of an in-person meeting for "Sometime Tomorrow Afternoon." So don't do that with phone calls.

Use these to get to an agreement:

What time is good for you? Or, I have these three times available - which one works for you?

Or even, why don't you let me know two or three times when you're available and I'll pick one?

If you have someone who is seems reluctant to set a meeting time over the phone, tell them about Paul and Lucille. Better yet, email them this article.

Charlie Hicks-Moore has been blogging for years, most recently at BigManWalking, his blog about using walking as a "gateway" exercise to a more active life and putting healthier food into your body. He has been actively networking since 2000 and enjoys helping people make connections and do what they are passionate about.

In February, 2010 he founded The Special Purpose Club on Facebook, which has grown to nearly 500 members. He hosts networking conference calls regularly where the spirit is similar to netweaving. Charlie has done major life work in self-development seminars including Results, Avatar and IBIGlobal and is qualified to be a coach. He has been a Toastmaster since 2001 and is active at Solana Beach Presbyterian Church and with the Reality Changers group that meets there. Charlie is working on a book of true stories: Redemption Happens.


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